I am FINALLY at the 2 week mark of NO YELLING! Ok, do I need to work on not yelling at my husband??? Yes. That's next ;)
But after spending way too much time feeling like a failure , I am happy to report that I have not only mastered catching myself before I raise voice towards my kids... but I also have taken more significant steps at figuring out my triggers, and essentially making sure those triggers don't exist!
* getting out the house in the morning : I now make NO plans first thing in the am. This will of course NOT work once Baby A starts school, but everyone will be older then, so I suspect it will go easier at that time.
Now, we have Spiderman who has school in the afternoon... daddy takes Sissy to school... and Babies A and B and myself make NO early plans when we can avoid it. This alleviates the morning hustle and mommy freak outs ;)
Now this theory obviously isn't going to work for everyone, especially our working mamas... but when we DO have something to do in the morning, I make sure I prepare everything I will need ahead of time. Lunches, diaper bags, laundry, clothes out; all that is done the night before.
* boredom: kids get bored and whiny + infant = mommy loses her $h*t ;)
Here in Maine the weather is finally getting nicer and we are finally escaping hibernation- thank God! Now, I make more of an effort to eliminate boredom. After breakfast, baby B goes in for a nap around 9:30 or 10am- so then the rest of us do yoga (on demand or a DVD at home) or color until we go outside around 11:30am.
I just need to keep my mind on finding ways to remain relaxed during a normal day.
While well meaning friends and family always tell me, "take some time for yourself!" "go for a walk" or just "take a nice bubble bath"...
* my fellow NNM mamas know that a SAHM with a husband that works sometimes 7 days a week- there is no "time for yourself".
* If I go for a walk, it's with all the kids- and honestly- it's usually NOT fun at all. The two older kids are bickering, Baby A is complaining that she's in a stroller and not walking, and Baby B gets bored after about 5 minutes whether she's being worn or in a stroller.
NOT relaxing. Usually results in yelling ;)
* and I can't even PEE by myself, how am I going to take a bath>??!!!!
Regardless, getting outside means a more relaxed and less-likely-to-yell mama.
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