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Wednesday, June 8, 2011

RealMama Week: Mothering Me

 RealMama Week, Day 3
Enjoy this beautiful post by Leslie Potter from Purejoy Parenting

Leslie Potter is the founder of Pure Joy Parenting, a joy based parenting model which supports parents in moving from a traditional fear-based model to a joy-based one, focusing on relationship and healthy attachment. She is a co-author of Chaos to Connection: 9 Heart Centered Essentials for Parenting your Teen. Leslie is a Parent Coach with a background as a body centered therapist. She created the Parent Coach model at Vive a national company working with at risk teens and their parents. In 2008, she founded Purejoy Parenting to educate and support new parents in understanding the importance of their attachment stories and how they affect their relationships with their children.

Mothering Me

Motherhood has stretched me beyond words.  How could I have known that one little soul could awaken such light, as well as illuminate such darkness.  When waiting for my daughter,  I imagined all the good aspects of being a mother.  I felt I was ready to surrender fully to the amazing opportunity I was being given.  Finally, after 44 years of waiting and preparing, I was going to be a mother.  It had taken me that long to embrace my childhood and feel I had done enough work that I wouldn't damage my child.

photo courtesy of Leslie Potter on Facebook

I was beyond excited for the opportunity to be the Mom I knew I had inside.  What I hadn't planned for was the depth of pain that would arise when I fell short.  Talk about humility!  This has been my path, and daily I bow down to my daughter for showing me the true path to loving myself.  When I am able to open to the depth of beauty and grace she provides, instead of needing her to behave the way I want her to so I look like a good mom, I can see clearly.

 I don't need her to validate me and have found I can relax and open to being a safe emotional container for her to learn and grow.  When I'm able to take full responsibility for my feelings and my stories, I am able to let her off the hook to be the beautiful light she embodies.

Learning to love myself starts with me and it is the greatest gift I offer my sweet girl.

Even though my love for her showed me the way, I learned that loving myself was up to me.  When I needed her to convince me that I was lovable, I felt the pain.  When I was finally able to step into the shoes of that amazing Mom I had inside...I began to mother ME as well as my daughter. 

How do you feel about the mom you ARE, versus the mom you thought you'd be?

* Find and 'like' Purejoy Parenting on Facebook 
* Check out her website & blog  for Leslie's Parenting Pearls and contact info 
* and be sure to follow her on Twitter 

Let her know NurturingtheNaturalMama sent you! <3

You can also check out Leslie's latest contribution to PBS here.

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